“You’re not obligated to win. You’re obligated to keep trying to do the best you can every day.” – Marian Wright Edelman
“When I dare to be powerful, to use my strength in the service of my vision, then it becomes less and less important whether I am afraid.” – Audre Lorde
“I am no longer accepting the things I cannot change. I am changing the things I cannot accept.” – Angela Y. Davis
Let me start with a confession, I did not watch the video of Tyre Nichols being beaten to his eventual death by police officers in Memphis. I have not and I will not. The toll it takes on my spirit is higher than I’m willing to pay. I am paying attention to what happened then and since. But even the way I framed it, as a confession, implies that I am somehow guilty of something. I know I’m not though, right? By not watching I may be putting my black card at risk, but if protecting my headspace is wrong, I don’t want to be right. It is, after all, my headspace. But still… I don’t begrudge those who have watched and analyzed and pontificated on what has and continues to happen in America from either side. I do judge people looking at this like it is trauma porn. There is tragedy, trauma, and tumult in what continues to happen to people of color at the hands of police who are supposed to be sworn to protect and serve, and those in power who are supposed to represent our interests. There is frustration, fear, and fury in the choices of those elected by We the people to focus on partisan political power instead of dealing with the issues that matter most. There is injustice, insult, and ignorance in governors and lawmakers deciding that they get to be the arbiters of what in Black History really matters and what lacks educational value, experts be damned. AND during the one month earmarked for all Black everything, the audacity. In the face of it all, it is easy to be paralyzed, (here we go again with word choice, if “paralyzed” triggers you, think “still” instead) to say to yourself and the world it is all too much. I can’t do anything about it. How could I, just one person, really make a difference? The answer is to do something, make something, break something, but not just anything, something. The difference lies in intentionality. Your something can be for you, your circle, your campus, your community, your city, your country, or for the world.
“The tragedy of life is often not in our failure, but rather in our complacency; not in our doing too much, but rather in our doing too little; not in our living above our ability, but rather in our living below our capacities.” – Benjamin E. Mays
“Not everything that is faced can be changed; but nothing can be changed until it is faced.” – James Baldwin
“I really don’t think life is about the I-could-have-beens. Life is only about the I-tried-to-do. I don’t mind the failure, but I can’t imagine that I’d forgive myself if I didn’t try.” – Nikki Giovanni
Something isn’t always external. Sometimes the work is internal. I had a moment when I saw a picture of myself, not a mirror, or a selfie, but a whole body shot taken by somebody else and I legit thought “Who is that? I know that ain’t me… it can’t be, can it…?” It was. I’ve been called some variant of “big guy” for most of my adult life. I’ve been good with it. I am neither short nor small so it kind of fits. Then, last fall out of nowhere, I started having to fight with the buttons on my clothes that weren’t sweats. Reality check! It wasn’t really out of nowhere. My clothes weren’t shrinking. I was lying to myself about what I chose to see in the mirror. So, I had to get to it and seek help. I went to my doctor and we did a whole baseline workup and came up with nutrition and exercise plans. I knew what I needed to do. I also knew I didn’t want to do it. But it had to be done right because health is wealth. Then… life. It became easy to say I’ll start later, tomorrow, or next week, or in the new year. Getting stuck will inevitably happen, just like getting knocked off course or knocked down. Get back up. Get back to it. You may not feel like you’re struggling at all. Just know, if you keep doing what you’ve been doing, you’ll keep getting what you’ve been getting. If that works for you, cool. If not, take the time, make the effort, and see the change.
“Success is a journey, not a destination. The doing is often more important than the outcome.” – Arthur Ashe
“Success is no accident. It is hard work, perseverance, learning, studying, sacrifice, and most of all, love of what you are doing or learning to do.” – Pelé
"When your dreams are bigger than the places you find yourself in, sometimes you need to seek out your own reminders that there is more. And there is always more waiting for you on the other side of fear." — Elaine Welteroth
There will always be reasons to not do and they will sound, feel, and seem like good reasons. Because not doing is easy. Not doing is comfortable. Not doing requires only one act, the decision to not do. And when you get really good at not doing, that won't even feel like a choice, you just won't do. It'll be due to some person or circumstance or situation or feeling or need or insert good reason here. But you can't get where you're going if you stay where you are. So where are you going? Do you even know? If you do, great, get busy getting. If not, great, all you need to start is a direction and a step. You can stop and turn or turn around as many times as you need to as you figure it out. Give it some thought, do some due diligence, talk to some people you trust, pick a direction, and go that way. What matters more than whether or not you can do it or know how to do it, is whether or not you do. Nike told you, Just Do It.
“Dreams without goals are just dreams and ultimately, they fuel disappointment. On the road to achieving your dreams, you must apply discipline but more importantly consistency because without commitment you’ll never start, but without consistency, you’ll never finish.” – Denzel Washington
What am I asking you to do?
1. Plan your work and work your plan. Set goals, work towards them. Finish what you start.
2. Change it up. If one approach isn’t working, try another.
3. Celebrate your accomplishments. When you hit a goal, make the time to celebrate. You’ve earned it. Then get back to work.
4. Grow your goals. As you approach one goal, set another. Keep giving yourself things to strive for.
5. Take care of YOU. As you move, take care of your whole self in real and tangible ways. If you need help, get help. If you need help finding the help, just say something, we are here for you.
6. Take care of your business. You are here to get your degree. Life requires balance for sure but keep the main thing the main thing. You have persevered through pandemic, campus closure, zoom, all of it. Keep that same energy and get this done. The world needs to see the brilliance you have to offer.
“Do or do not. There is no try.” – Yoda
Now go be great!
Any views or opinions expressed in this missive are solely the author’s and do not represent that of the University of Maryland, Baltimore County or any programs, departments, or partners affiliated with UMBC. While I make every effort to ensure that the information I am sharing is accurate, I welcome any comments, suggestions, or correction of errors.